HOW TO OVERCOME THE FEAR OF MISSING OUT (FOMO) FOR CHRISTIAN MILLENNIALS.
Estimated reading time: 13 minutes
Did you know you can overcome FOMO? Want to know how? Then keep on reading. FOMO is very common, especially in the present age of social media use. But exactly what is it? And how can you overcome the fear of missing out? As human beings, we all have desires and goals that we would like to achieve. Unfortunately, when the goals don’t happen within our set time frame, we can feel left out. This could lead one to feel like they are missing out. Sometimes there is also the aspect of feeling left out when people do something or go places without you.
Have you been feeling this way of late? Is everyone else’s life around you progressing while yours is stuck? Maybe you could experience FOMO because they did not invite you to a party or can’t do what everyone else is doing because of certain limitations. Has this caused you to feel left behind? Are you wondering how you can overcome it and learn to trust the process? Then this word will encourage you.
Read also: Don’t worry, you are next.
Definition of FOMO.
Fear of missing out a.k.a. FOMO is the feeling of anxiety or insecurity over the possibility of missing out on something, such as an event or an opportunity.
When according to society, your life does not take the expected turn, it is very easy for you to experience FOMO. Fortunately, there is a way, as a Christian, you can overcome it. Are you tired of always trying to keep up, whether physically, financially, or mentally? Do you want to get to where you are okay with being excluded from certain activities? You might want to live your life without always having to chase after the next event or trend. If so, then read on.
The root of FOMO ( Fear of Missing Out.) (Symptoms.)
Insecurities.
When you feel you are not good enough, you often want to fit in and this could lead you to feel you don’t want to miss out on anything. When instead of appreciating who you are and where you are, you focus on external validation, keeping up will be your norm and lead to FOMO. This could be as simple as feeling like you are not pretty enough, educated, popular, or charismatic enough. Insecurity will lead you to want to chase after fleeting things just to keep up and stay relevant.
Lack and limitations.
Sometimes not having some things you need could cause you to experience FOMO. This is because you end up placing so much value on what you miss, it increases that fear that your limitation is causing you to miss out on the good things. Has the lack of certain opportunities caused you to overextend yourself for fear of missing out? Maybe you lack financial freedom and because of that, you attend all the seminars you can find in a bid to avoid missing out on an opportunity.
Lack of identity.
When you don’t know who you are and your value, you can easily experience FOMO. Because you lack the grounding of a sense of belonging and a place of safety, you might want to seek external validation, causing you to want to fit in. And by doing so, you feel bad when you are excluded.
Again, when you don’t know who you are, you associate with those that are popular or influential because you are seeking validation and want to be a part of something. And by doing so you will try to do everything to please them, including doing things that make you uncomfortable. Unfortunately, when you do so and it does not work, you end up frustrated and with a lack of focus. Did you know that not all opportunities are good for you? Just because an opportunity worked for someone else does not mean it will work for you.
The dangers of FOMO
- Frustration and bitterness can stem from FOMO. This can be because of financial constraints, or just exhaustion from the endless cycles of the next best thing.
- Lack of clarity- Trying to do everything and be everything for everyone will lead you to not know your purpose. How will you know your purpose when you don’t know when to say no?
- Lack of identity – Following the trend will have you unaware of who you are are
- People pleasing
- Distraction
- Anxiety and extreme mental issues
How then can you overcome FOMO?
Stay grounded in Jesus.
In Jesus, you will experience the fullness of joy and ultimate fulfillment. Jesus does not want you to put on a show with Him or try to keep up. You can rest assured that you are good enough in Jesus. There is no performance with Him. His love is unconditional and enough. He will never love you any more than He does right now or any less. Knowing this will help you run at your own pace and know that you do not need to achieve anything to be validated and loved by Him. Having a revelation that Jesus loves you unconditionally will give you the confidence to trust in His timing and His will and recognize that you will never miss His will.
The love of Jesus will also help you realize you do not need to surround yourself with people who don’t want you and instead focus on those who do. Also, the love of Jesus will help get rid of all insecurities because it is perfect love that casts out all fear. Ask Jesus through prayer to fill you out with His love and write every emotion you will feel after. Jesus will help change you to realize that it is not the fleeting things that matter, rather it is who you really are that matters. The love of Jesus will help you live your authentic self and be very okay with solitude, too.
Read also: How to live authentically.
While Jesus was at the Passover Feast, the number of his followers began to grow, and many gave their allegiance to him because of all the miraculous signs they had seen him doing! But Jesus did not yet entrust himself to them, because he knew how fickle human hearts can be. He didn’t need anyone to tell him about human nature, for he fully understood what man was capable of doing. John 2:23-25 TPT
If they could do this to Jesus, what would make you any different? Understanding the fickleness of the human heart will help you overcome the fear of missing out. This is because it will ease the pressure you have placed on yourself to try to keep up and instead learn to be content. Jesus is the only one you can fully rely on. So then why would you be so focused on what everyone else is doing?
Trusting the process will help you overcome FOMO.
God has a definite plan for you and a specific destiny. You can never miss God’s will for your life. You need to realize THAT God is Sovereign, and He has you in the palm of His hand. God has a destiny with your name on it and what God has for you has your name on it. You can never miss what God has for you. Joseph was in prison when his day of visitation came and he did not miss it.
That God is Sovereign should make you realize He will track you down where you are because He sees all and knows all. Esther did not miss her promise despite the huge number of women selected as contestants to win the king’s approval. Boaz identified Ruth while she was in the field, plowing. God knows your address and therefore you will not miss what God has for you.
You saw who you created me to be before I became me! Before I’d ever seen the light of day, the number of days you planned for me were already recorded in your book. Every single moment you are thinking of me! How precious and wonderful to consider that you cherish me constantly in your every thought! O God, your desires toward me are more than the grains of sand on every shore! When I awake each morning, you’re still with me. Psalms 139:16-18 TPT
God already has a destiny in mind for you. All He wants you to do is trust His timing and know that every good and perfect thing comes from Him. Your time will come and God will fulfill your hopes. He who has promised is true and can be trusted to fulfill what He has in store for you. That He began a good work in you means He will bring it to completion. Focus on the big picture. What is God teaching you now? What lessons does He want you to take while waiting? Why is He isolating you? God knows what He is doing, just trust the process and follow His lead.
This means that, contrary to man’s perspective, the Lord is not late with his promise to return, as some measure lateness. But rather, his “delay” simply reveals his loving patience toward you, because he does not want any to perish but all to come to repentance. 2 Peter 3:9 TPT
Have an expectant heart.
For you to eliminate the fear of missing out, you need to expect that God will do great things in your life. David, in the book of Psalm chapter 27, had to encourage himself by saying that although things looked bad now, he was confident that he would see God’s goodness. You become what you expect and when you focus on God’s goodness overwhelming you and manifesting in your life, you will not have time to experience FOMO? Celebrate that it’s other people’s turn to enjoy and have a good time, but also expect that God will do the same for you too. God always wants to lavish you with good things so never doubt that.
Yet I totally trust you to rescue me one more time, so that I can see once again how good you are while I’m still alive! Here’s what I’ve learned through it all: Don’t give up; don’t be impatient; be entwined as one with the Lord. Be brave and courageous, and never lose hope. Yes, keep on waiting—for he will never disappoint you! Psalms 27:13-14 TPT
The same God who came through for David will do the same for you, only believe that He is good and that every good gift comes from Him and is for you too.
Know who you are.
Do you know who you are? Let God be the only one to validate you. Read the Bible and know what God says about you. He has so many wonderful things He has spoken over you, and one of them is that you are His child. When you focus on your identity in Christ, you will not need to be where everyone else is at all times. Instead, you will be content and enjoy your journey. Knowing your identity gives you the confidence that it is okay to be where you are at the moment. And realize everything will work out for your good. Identity will lead you to extend grace to yourself and take the pressure of keeping up off you.
Whenever you find yourself doubting who you are let these scriptures remind you.
But those who embraced him and took hold of his name were given authority to become the children of God! John 1:12 TPT
For it was always in his perfect plan to adopt us as his delightful children, through our union with Jesus, the Anointed One, so that his tremendous love that cascades over us would glorify his grace—for the same love he has for his Beloved One, Jesus, he has for us. And this unfolding plan brings him great pleasure! Ephesians 1:5-6 TPT
As a child of God, do you need to keep up with what everyone else is doing? Is it worth it? Why would you allow the world to dictate what you should or shouldn’t do and where you should be in life? God’s got you.
Track Negative Thoughts
Tracking negative thoughts will help you analyze them and find patterns that lead to dissatisfaction in your life. FOMO stems from a lack of satisfaction, which is rooted in negative thought patterns. So, when you become aware of all the negative thoughts, you will minimize FOMO.
Replace negative thoughts with positive thoughts
This is the art of renewing your mind. By renewing your mind, which stems from replacing negative thoughts with positive ones, you minimize FOMO. This is because you will be content with who you are and you will discover your identity. Discovering your identity will lead you to focus only on things that truly matter to you and leave out those that don’t matter.
Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will. Romans 12:2
One way to do so is through reading the Bible. The Bible contains everything there is to know about your identity. An example is when you know you are a co-heir with Jesus you realize you don’t need to chase after every opportunity.
Knowing that you were created for a purpose will lead you to focus on the things that push you into your purpose and therefore leave out all those that don’t. The revelation that you are a child of God will cause you to stop pleasing people because you recognize that you have a sense of belonging. When you know that there is a time for everything, you suddenly find contentment in your current state and instead focus on learning the lessons there so that you can move to the next level.
Be present
Be present in what you are doing at the moment. Whether you are watching, reading a book, spending time with loved ones or whatever the case may be. Be present and allow yourself to soak in the moment. Truth be told, there is always something you can be grateful for. And another thing you need to remember is that your mundane activities are somebody else’s prayer points. So be grateful for where you are in life and know that as long as you are living, God is not done with you yet.
Conclusion.
Unless you fix the inside, you will always experience FOMO and the only way to change that is by knowing who you are in Christ and trusting the process. It is okay if you miss events and activities here and there. It is okay if you don’t get invited to parties and places. You don’t have to be everywhere all the time. Instead, focus on what God is asking you to do right now. And trust that when the time is right, He will bring to pass the very things you need and desire.
He is a loving father and wants to lavish on you the very best, so if He is making you wait, trust that He has a reason and is not punishing you. Lean on God and Him alone. It is okay to miss out on a few things and opportunities here and there if they sidetrack you from your purpose. To help you through this journey, I created a checklist on how you can overcome FOMO, check it out and download it here.
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Radiantly Resurging
Mercy is the author and founder of radiantly resurging. She is a Christian and having gone through the wilderness season, she decided to impart the knowledge learned to help others navigate their wilderness season too
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