HOW TO DEAL WITH VALENTINE’S DAY AS A SINGLE CHRISTIAN MILLENNIAL.

Estimated reading time: 14 minutes

I don’t know about you, but there was a time that Valentine’s Day irked me. This was because it was a reminder that I was single yet again. Don’t get me wrong; it’s easy to choose someone for the day. But when you desire substance and connection to prove a point, then it becomes a challenge. This then begs the question, how do you deal with Valentine’s Day as a Single Christian millennial? Is there a proven way to help you deal with that day honorably? Especially if you have a desire to settle down or have that special someone. Well, I have a few tips that I know will help you. So, let’s get started.

Table of Contents

• 5 Tips that will help you deal with Valentine’s Day as a Single Christian Millennial.
  • Ask for clarity from the Holy Spirit regarding the season you are in.
    • Luke 1
    • Reasons why your season could differ from your counterparts.
  • Scriptures to help you deal with Valentine’s Day as a Single Christian millennial as it pertains to God’s timing
    •  How then can you ask the Holy Spirit for clarity concerning the season you are in?
      • Something to note
  • Find contentment in your current season as this will help you deal with Valentine’s Day as a single Christian millennial.
  • How to exercise contentment as a single Christian millennial
  • Scriptures that will help you learn how to maximize your single season.
• Always Remember this:

5 Tips that will help you deal with Valentine’s Day as a Single Christian Millennial.

Ask for clarity from the Holy Spirit regarding the season you are in.

Just because your peers are in relationships does not mean the same case applies to you. There is such a thing as God’s timing. Unless you ask the Holy Spirit for clarity concerning the season you are in, you will find yourself comparing your winter season to someone else’s summer season. As a Christian millennial, it is imperative to realize that God has us in different seasons. And this is according to His purposes and plan. And to help you drive the point home, let us look at a Bible scripture.

Luke 1

When Elizabeth’s counterparts were having kids, she did not. I am sure that she questioned whether she was good enough and even wondered why she had to go through barrenness and in the public eye at that. After all, her husband, Zechariah, was a priest. Year in and year out, they kept bringing their petition to God, but it looked as if God did not want to answer them. However, since we know the story, we see that their temporary disappointment served a greater purpose in the salvation of humanity.

You see, God chose John to herald the coming of Jesus. And John needed to be close in age for that to happen. Therefore, God opted to temporarily disappoint both Elizabeth and Zechariah by closing her womb, until it was time for Jesus’ birth. After all, they are only 6 months apart.

Reading this story, we can conclude that God has a set time for what He does. And at the moment it might seem like He is delaying. But I want to encourage you to spend time with the Holy Spirit so He can reveal to you your current season. It does not always mean that you are due to settle down or date when your counterparts are doing the same. There is always a set time for you to experience the very things you desire to experience in life.

Reasons why your season could differ from your counterparts.

Could it be that you are not as ready as you think for a relationship? Think about it. Maybe you have some inner healing to do. Maybe your perception of marriage is skewed and God wants to help transform your thinking. Or maybe you have baggage from your past relationships that God wants to help you let go of. The reality is that God is a wonderful Father. And He never wants to withhold anything from you unless it could be detrimental to you.

Think about this for a second. With you being broken, do you think you will give your best in the relationship? After all, God cares for your spouse too, and He wants him/her to experience your best version. Don’t always interpret waiting as punishment. Often when God has you in a waiting season, He is preparing and mostly protecting you. God loves you so much that He is willing to disappoint you now and save you from further pain to set you up for a glorious future. And to help you with this, here are scriptures that prove it.

Scriptures to help you deal with Valentine’s Day as a Single Christian millennial as it pertains to God’s timing

Ecclesiastes 3:1 There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens.

Galatians 6: 9 Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.

2 Peter 3: 8-9 But do not forget this one thing, dear friends: With the Lord a day is like a thousand years, and a thousand years are like a day. The Lord is not slow in keeping His promise, as some understand slowness. Instead, He is patient with you, not wanting anyone to perish, but everyone to come to repentance

Galatians 4: 4 But when the set time had fully come, God sent his Son, born of a woman, born under the law,

Ecclesiastes 8: 6 For there is a proper time and procedure for every matter, though a person may be weighed down by misery.

Genesis 21: 1-3 And the Lord visited Sarah as he had said, and the Lord did unto Sarah as he had spoken. For Sarah conceived, and bore Abraham a son in his old age, at the set time of which God had spoken to him. And Abraham called the name of his son that was born unto him, whom Sarah bore to him, Isaac.

How then can you ask the Holy Spirit for clarity concerning the season you are in?

The most effective way is through reading the Bible. Granted, there might not be a clear blueprint regarding your particular situation. However, you will find a rough idea of the season you are in. Looking at Joseph’s story, you see that he went through a long season of hiding. And it was after God revealed him to Pharaoh that he also received his spouse. Reading this scripture could help you discern that you are in the season of building and developing your craft. This can especially be true if you feel hidden in other areas of your life as well.

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Prayer and fasting are other great tools that can help you gain clarity regarding your current season. The Holy Spirit wants to speak to you more than you want to listen. Sometimes the reason you can’t hear Him is because many voices are speaking to you, hence can’t discern His voice. Other times maybe you don’t know His voice. And this is why prayer and fasting are vital keys that will help you discern His voice with clarity.

Sometimes we ignore one of the simplest keys because we want to complicate things. And this key is simply asking Him. No formula, just a simple ask. After all, the Bible promises us that when we ask, He will reveal to us. Have you asked Him what season you are in?

Something to note

One thing I have to also tell you is that the Holy Spirit has different ways of speaking to us. He can choose to speak through dreams, visions, a still small voice, inner knowing, or confirmation from trusted spiritual people around you. Sometimes He can even use a billboard or a phrase while speaking to a friend. The key however is to test every prophecy or word you hear and make sure it aligns with His word. After all, the Holy Spirit will never contradict His word. And He could even speak to you when you least expect it. Just be expectant that He will speak to you. As it is an expectation that birth encounters that lead to revelation.

Find contentment in your current season as this will help you deal with Valentine’s Day as a single Christian millennial.

Contentment is key if you want to navigate this single life as a Christian millennial. Otherwise, you will find yourself doing things you wouldn’t do just to numb the loneliness and the sense of feeling left behind. Remember this, you cannot always control every outcome. There are things you should simply leave to God and allow Him to be the One to guide you and release you into your marital settlement. We serve a God who can never forget you. It might feel like He has, but I assure you He hasn’t. How then can you develop contentment as a single Christian millennial?

How to exercise contentment as a single Christian millennial

• Find your identity in Christ.

Often times discontentment comes from having a comparison mentality and being competitive in nature. And the root cause is a lack of a sense of belonging. This is why knowing your identity in Christ is imperative. Who does God say you are? Knowing this will help you overcome the sense of loneliness that leads to discontentment.

Comparing yourself with others will only lead to more pain. Have an awareness of who God says you are. And recognize that what’s for you will not miss you. Again, knowing your identity in Christ will also help you understand who God is to you. This will then help you trust Him. Knowing that you are co-heir with Christ will assure you that God has great thoughts concerning your life. And when the time is right, He will make it happen.

Knowing your identity in Christ comes from spending time with Him, reading His word, and praying. As you spend time in His presence, He will reveal to you who He is to you and who you are to Him. You don’t need to get your identity from the world, as it will give you a skewed perception of yourself. Looking at the world will make you feel left behind and as if you are missing out. Getting married at 35 is still as beautiful as getting married at 25. And we are all on different journeys. Being single in your 30s is still okay as long as you are in the will of God.

• maximize your time

In order to deal with Valentine’s day as a single Christian millennial you need to understand that, instead of being idle, find things to keep you busy. Of course, this does not mean to try and fill up your time to numb the pain. All I am saying is, to live life, explore, find new hobbies, and try new things. Instead of waiting for someone to take you out or to take out, take yourself out on that date. Remind yourself of how fabulous you are.

Wear that cute outfit. You know, pamper yourself, love on yourself. Treat yourself and do for yourself the things you want someone to do for you or what you would want to do for someone. You can also decide to hang out with friends and make it a Galentine if you are a lady.. Make it memorable for you. Some of these experiences you will look back on and be glad that you got to experience them. Smell the roses and enjoy the freedom you have right now. There is always beauty in every season. Find it.

Connect with those friends and make meaningful connections. Some of these friendships you build right now might be what anchor you in difficult seasons. Invest in your friendships. Recognize that it is at this time that you can make time for them, spend quality time with them, and build genuine bonds. Don’t be scarce when your friends need you and expect them to show up for you when you need them.

Make them feel seen, heard, and celebrated. That gift you would have wanted to get for your significant other. Why not get it for your friend? Make her/him feel appreciated. You can send them a simple note or invite them for dinner. Whatever you can, do it. Why not?

• Remind yourself that nothing is wrong with you

Being single is not a punishment for not getting things right. Just like being married is not a reward for doing everything right. There is nothing wrong with you. You are just on a different calendar. And sometimes maybe God is preparing something very special, and that’s why He is making you wait. Don’t feel bad for not wanting to settle for less than what you desire. Rather be excited that you get to walk on a unique journey where God custom makes your special someone. Granted, they won’t be perfect. After all, you are not perfect too. However, they will complement you.

Remember in the book of Genesis when God said it was not good for man to be alone, rather, He would create a partner suitable for him. There is such a thing as suitability and someone being the right one for you. God, being your creator, knows who will mesh with your character and personality and who will be right for your spirit, soul, destiny, and every other area of your life. And it could be the reason you are yet to find the one is because deep down you know you want the best of what God has for you.

If this is your story, find testimonies of people who had to wait for long periods before settling down and see their end story. This will give you the confidence to wait on God. His timing will be perfect. So on Valentine’s day, instead of sulking, rejoice with the awareness that when God finally reveals you to your person, He will redeem the time and double the joy. That is why He says that He will give double for the trouble experienced. He knows it is not easy. He just wants you to hold on.

Don’t fall into the trap of thinking that there are no good guys left. All you need is one person. And again, don’t allow the enemy to lie to you and make you feel you missed it. God is a God of second chances, therefore if you missed it, He will bring that opportunity again. Or better yet, you’ve not missed it and He is just working behind the scenes so He can make everything beautiful in His time.

Scriptures that will help you learn how to maximize your single season.

Ephesians 5:15-17 So, then, be careful how you live. Do not be unwise but wise, making the best use of your time because the times are evil. Therefore, do not be foolish, but understand what the Lord’s will is.

Colossians 4:5 Behave wisely toward outsiders, making the best use of your time.

Psalm 90:12 Teach us to number our days, so that we may gain a heart of wisdom.

Ecclesiastes 3:11 Yet God has made everything beautiful for its own time. He has planted eternity in the human heart, but even so, people cannot see the whole scope of God’s work from beginning to end.

Proverbs 16:9 A person plans his way, but the LORD directs his steps.

Matthew 6:33 But seek ye first his kingdom, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you.

Psalm 37:5 Commit your way to the LORD; trust in Him, and He will act.

Always Remember this:

In order for you to deal with Valentine’s day as a single Christian millennial, i need you to understand this truth: Being single does not mean you are lonely. And even when it feels like you are alone, God is right there with you. He would love for you to include Him in your ways. He wants to see you smile. And in this time He wants you to make Him your first love. Knowing He loves you will help you patiently wait for the one He has for you.

Yes, time is moving, however, God redeems time. I particularly enjoyed listening to Iman and Stephon’s video on their love story. They had waited for long and for Stephon’s case. He had waited for 6 years. And when the time was right, God remembered him and connected them and they got married in 5 months. And they have been in bliss mode since then. Another thing is that their story touched the hearts of many and now God gave them a platform to share their story. Allow God to write your love story. Don’t let this one day lead you to make mistakes you can never take back.

Instead of sulking, use this day to meditate on God’s love for you. While it is not ideal for you, it will bring that sense of peace and release every ounce of loneliness from your heart. Remember that you are the apple of God’s eye. And although there could be a physical void you are experiencing, God can and wants to fill it. Allow Him to speak over you and shower you with His goodness.

And lastly, I want you to always remember that delay is not denial. God is preparing someone special for you. And sometimes He gives His best last. It does not mean you are forgotten, it is not yet time. Celebrate those who are in their summer season. And always remember, if God can do it for them, He will surely do if for you too.I hope this post has helped you learn how to deal with Valentine’s Day as a single Christian millennial. Happy Valentines. I would love to hear from you. How do you intend to spend Valentine’s Day as a single Christian millennial? What are some pressures you are experiencing? Until next time, XoXo