How To Experience Emotional Healing: 4 Weeks to Becoming

Estimated reading time: 11 minutes

For those who are not aware, we are on a 4 week journey to becoming this October. And every week we have a pillar we are focusing on. Last week we talked about spiritual detox and today I want us to look at the second pillar which is how to experience emotional healing. While discussing spiritual detox, we realized that it is important to focus on being and not just doing. Emotional healing is necessary if you have experienced emotional exhaustion. What exactly is emotional exhaustion?

• • Emotional exhaustion definition
  • Signs of emotional exhaustion.
• Causes of emotional exhaustion
• How the emotional healing pillar came about.
  • The Turnaround
• The story of Hannah.
• The Journey from Emotional Exhaustion to Emotional Healing
  • Decide that you have had enough so you can experience emotional healing.
  • Find your place of solace as this will help you in your journey to emotional healing.
  • Become aware of the emotions by naming and confronting them
  • Release and replace to experience emotional healing
  • Start new practices.
• Conclusion

4 Weeks to Becoming: A Journey of Unlearning & Becoming.

Emotional exhaustion definition

Emotional exhaustion stems from a place of acting like you are okay when you are not, trying to be strong yet breaking inside, pouring into others and not having a source to pour into you, giving of yourself and getting little to nothing back. It is a way of the soul signalling fatigue. It is the soul’s way of saying, I am tired, I want to rest. I am done striving. It is the soul calling you out of self-sufficiency and detox instead. Have you been running on empty? Then you could be experiencing what is known as emotional exhaustion.

Signs of emotional exhaustion.

• Numbness or being overly sensitive. You get to a place where you get easily triggered or show no reaction at all to painful situations.

• Expecting the worst especially if you have gone through a long season of unanswered prayers and hope deferred. If you find out that you rarely expect good things to happen to you and for you, or that you have weak hope, then you could be dealing with emotional exhaustion.

• A feeling of detachment or despair. Not finding joy in anything. If you find that you have no desire to do things that used to do and not enjoying them, then you could be dealing with emotional exhaustion.

• Feeling distant from God. If you have been feeling a disconnect in your relationship with God especially if it has lasted for a while, that could be a sign. Let me ask you this, does the thought of spending time with God or reading the Bible make you happy or annoy you? The answer to this,will reveal whether you are emotionally exhausted or not.

• Overthinking, low focus and mental fog. Has your mind been running on overdrive? Do you have never0endong mental battles?

• Feeling fatigue even after sleeping. If despite getting enough rest you wake up feeling tired, then you have a case of emotional exhaustion.

Causes of emotional exhaustion

• Unprocessed emotions. If you have been suppressing your emotions instead of dealing with them, you will get to a place of emotional burnout. God created us in such a way that we could process our emotions. That was why Jesus would retreat. When He learned that Herod had killed his cousin John the Baptist, he retreated. If Jesus who is also God could do that, it shows us that we should process our emotions instead of holding them in.

• Emotional over giving. Have you been pouring into others and receiving little to nothing of the same? Maybe you have been dealing with a situation where you forgive easily without even processing the pain that the person has caused you. Or maybe you tend to empathize with others and end up overlooking yourself or what you feel. This can over time lead to emotional exhaustion.

• Striving in your own strength. Have you been trying to make things work on your own Maybe you feel the need to take control of situations without feeling the need to ask others for help. Are you the person that people rely on the most? Do people expect you to act strong all the time? Is there little room for you to make mistakes? If this sounds like you, then you could be experiencing emotional exhaustion.

• Long waiting seasons. If you have gone through long seasons of waiting, you could be experiencing emotional exhaustion. Long seasons of waiting lead to hope deferred and the Bible tells us that this makes the heart sick. Having a sick heart leads to emotional fatigue. Especially when you don’t deal with the pain that comes from disappointment and the feelings that come when people let you down..

• Unhealed heart wounds. Bitterness and unforgiveness lead to emotional exhaustion. God did not create your heart to carry negative emotions. Therefore, when you find yourself harboring negative emotions and unprocessed wounds, t=over time your soul gets weary and you end up experiencing burnout.

How the emotional healing pillar came about.

I thought that because I had gone through the spiritual detox that I was now okay. In fact I thought that I had processed everything and was now ready for my new. Unfortunately, that was not the case You see, a particular situation happened that jolted me back to reality. I had gone through a season where I was pouring into others and not getting the same in return. In fact, I was always the person who accommodated people when they messed up trying to understand them or even empathize with them. And instead of processing the pain inflicted, I would sweep it under the rug. Not only that, I had gotten to the rhythm of performing and doing everything that was expected of me without taking into account how some of the things were affecting me.

I was used to not having my emotions considered because people considered me as either sensitive or emotional. I also think because I had experienced some of these situations for long now, things like rejection and disappointment, it was expected that I would get over it and keep it pushing. Unfortunately, that does not work. So recently I snapped and did something that was out of character. This shocked me and the person on the receiving end of the outburst. I could not believe it. While the situation was embarrassing, it also made me resolve to get to the bottom of it. I just wanted to deal with it so it never happens again.

The Turnaround

Mind you the said situation happened on a Sunday after church. So that night before going to sleep I sat in silence on my bed and said a very simple prayer. I asked God to heal my emotions so that the outbursts could cease. And that was when He started revealing to me that I had never taken the time to grieve disappointment and all the unanswered prayers I had been carrying. You see, because the disappointments and rejection had been frequent, I assumed that I had gotten used to them. In fact I concluded that I was better at handling them now. This was further from the truth because I had entered a rhythm of shrugging things of and moving on.

In the midst of my desire to heal, the Lord revealed something to me. And to help us do that I want us to look at the story of Hannah.

The story of Hannah.

We find this story in 1 Samuel 1 and here is the summary. You see, Hannah was barren because the Lord had shut her womb. But this is the funny thing. She had a husband who loved her and a co wife who taunted her. In verse 4 and 5, the Bible tells us that Elkannah gave Hannah a double portion of the sacrifice because of his love for her. Unfortunately, this was the most he could give her. On the other hand, he gave Peninnah a portion for her and her children too. So, each year Hannah went through the same reminder every time her husband gave her co wife’s children a portion. This was a reminder she had to live with.

I don’t know how many times you have gone through a situation that reminds you of some unanswered prayer you have had for a long time. In Hannah’s case, she realized her husband’s love was not enough. And while he did everything he could do to make it easy for her, it still did not stop her from experiencing that void. Maybe for you it is the fact that you are unemployed and living with your parents. And regardless of how comfortable your parents try to make you feel, it is still not enough. One thing I want us to realize is that just because you have an area that is going on well in your life, if you have experienced hope deferred in another area, you cannot ignore the emotions that come when you sit in that pain and agony for long.

Hannah had never dealt with those emotions. She harbored them year in year out, that is why Peninah’s taunting triggered her to the point of tears. Fortunately for her she discovered the secret to her turnaround and journey to emotional healing. And this is what I want to share with you.

The Journey from Emotional Exhaustion to Emotional Healing

Emotional healing comes when you decide that you have had enough and decide to confront your situation. Have you had enough? Are you tired of carrying the weight on your shoulder? Maybe like me you are tired of the outbursts that come when you have had enough? You have come to the right place.

Decide that you have had enough so you can experience emotional healing.

Hannah had had enough of the crying. She knew something needed to change. She was now ready to take matters into her own hands. The same goes for you. You have to get to the place where you decide that something needs to change. Until you get to that place, you are not ready for emotional healing. Once you have made that decision, then you go to the next step and that is confront the emotions.

Find your place of solace as this will help you in your journey to emotional healing.

In verse 7, the Bible tells us that after the sacrificial meal, Hannah retreated to pray. God is your source of emotional healing. The fact that you have tried doing it on your own and failed is the sign you need to recognize that your success will come when you process it with God. Don’t pretend before Him. Come to Him raw and unashamed. The Bible tells us that He will not cast away a contrite heart. He is also close to the broken-hearted. The beauty about God is that He is all-knowing. He already knows what you are dealing with. He has just been waiting on you. Don’t delay, come to Him now.

Become aware of the emotions by naming and confronting them

Hannah described her emotions as deep anguish in verse 15 and 16. She was not afraid to say that she was discouraged and in great sorrow. The same goes for you. It is imperative that you name your emotions. Do not be afraid to tell God exactly what you are feeling. He is a safe space. After all, He already knows what you are feeling so all He is waiting is for you to tll Him so He can help you process and deal with them.

Naming your emotions also helps you to actually deal with the correct emotions. Again honesty is your pathway to healing. You cannot pretend to be sad when in fact you are angry or even disappointed. Correctly naming your emotions is key. Can you describe your emotions? After naming them, now allow yourself to feel these emotions. Remember you are in God’s presence and He can handle them. Besides that, He is a safe space that will help you deal with them without judging you.

Release and replace to experience emotional healing

As you allow yourself to feel these emotions, release them to God. Lay them at His feet. You can just say a simple prayer telling them that you are ready to release them to Him. And then ask Him to replace these emotions with the fruit of the Holy Spirit.

This process cannot be rushed. What I encourage you to do is to actually sit with these feelings until you experience that shift. When you read the story of Hannah you will note that once she had dealt with her emotions her countenance changed. That is where you want to get to. Sit still with God and ask you to help you release and give Him room to replace. You can repeat this process for as long as you need to until you experience that shift. It might take a day it might take long. You might even find that every day you will have different emotions that you are dealing with. That is okay.

Keep showing up until the emotions are replaced. And don’t be embarrassed if it looks like the same emotions you thought you dealt with the last time have cropped up. Allow yourself to feel until they leave. You will know they have left when you are left with a great sense of peace or joy and not feel like you have something stuck in your throat.

Start new practices.

Learn to say no. And also limit your interactions with those that bring out the worst in you. Don’t be afraid to ask for help when you need it. And also don’t overextend yourself. Next week we will look at heart healing as the reason you people-please is because you have a wound that you need to have healed.

Set time aside to spend alone and do the things that you enjoy. Learn to prioritize yourself. The others will still be there after you have filled your cup.

• 4 Weeks to Becoming: A Journey of Unlearning & Becoming.
• Welcome to Radiantly Resurging.
• How To Eliminate Emotional Decision-Making in Financial Matters.
• THE POWER IN ACKNOWLEDGING YOUR PAIN
• HOW TO MAKE ROOM FOR THE NEW.

Conclusion

I would love to know the part that spoke to you most. The Lord wants you to know that it is okay to express your emotions to Him. He created with emotions that means they don’t intimidate Him. He however wants you to learn how to express them in a healthy way and with Him. Click the link to get the free workbook that will help you further process your emotions and get on the emotional healing journey. I would love to hear your experience so far. Is this challenge helping you? If so, how?

As I end this blog, I want you to remember that God can be trusted. He loves you so much and He wants you to become who He created you to be and walk with wholeness. See you next week. This October, let us become!